Sunday, February 8, 2009

What Your Momma Warned You About

My mom once told me (and so did my girlfriends, who I am sure must've been similarly warned by their mothers; bless their doting souls) that when in a relationship, always make sure that the guy loves you more than you do him.

The first time I heard that, I thought " What sort of feministic statement is that? " That came from me, and I assure you that I am very much a female myself, thank you. Still, I didn't like the sound of those words put together in such a combative tone. Since when did love become a competition? "Oh..he loves me more, so I guess that means I wear the pants in this one!"

Maybe I'm just a hopeless romantic, but doesn't anyone else feel that a saying like that strips away every possible ounce of romance? Yes yes, call me naive but why do we force ourselves to consciously assess our relationships to see if we're the ones getting the better end of the deal? Now you're probably thinking I'm so 'kua cheong'. But isn't it just like a deal when you find yourself being self-content, confident that he holds more affection for you than you could ever muster, even on your most lovey-dovey days?

What I hate most about it, is that it lingers in the back of my mind and patronizingly pops up whenever I've had a little tiff with the boyfriend, or if he forgets to call, or if he calls and doesn't sound the least bit interested (Guys, *deep sigh* The list is endless but you get my point). Makes me want to hold back all acts of affection just so I can say that I'm still in the game, I haven't lost.

These are just my opinions. I know there are plenty of girls out there who hold steadfastly onto this belief and I respect that. As for me, I'm happy just having a chance to love, and knowing that those feelings of mine are fondly reciprocated.

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